We’ve all found ourselves in situations, be it at a social gathering or hosting an event, where tensions lurk beneath the surface. Picture a family reunion on my deck, where two brothers shared dislike for each other hung heavy in the air. No physical altercations or raised voices, but an undeniable discomfort, thick enough to slice.
Fast forward, both brothers have passed, leaving me with lingering reflections on what I “shoulda, coulda, woulda” done differently as the host. This personal experience became a catalyst for my proactive approach with clients and colleagues. I’ve gotten a reputation for posing questions they might shy away from, nurturing a dialogue that leads to insight and action.
The core of my approach develops a culture of genuine listening, where we confront the proverbial elephant in the room:
“You two seem to be avoiding each other.”
“What might be causing that?”
“What’s the history between the two of you?”
“What needs to change for you to cooperate with each other ?”
Action Ideas:
While large corporations employ annual employee climate surveys, different approaches can delve deeper at the division or department level.
One department opts for community meetings before lunch, creating space for brief celebrations, discussions on successes or challenges, and specific support requests.
In the mini-town hall model, leaders actively seek perspectives and ideas from their stakeholders while crafting project action plans.
The management-by-walking-around method involves strolling through the workspace, aiming for conversations that yield at least one new idea per encounter.
The open-door approach, though effective, demands a foundation of trust before staff openly share problems and solutions.
Drawing inspiration from Japan, where line workers can halt production if issues arise and discuss it with a supervisor. The importance of trust and a listening culture is evident.
Now, this professional experience has seamlessly integrated into my personal life. I’ve become adept at salvaging lackluster get-togethers by introducing a disarming icebreaker or subtly addressing interpersonal tensions. Whether it’s business or personal, the questions remains –
- What methods have proven effective in developing a listening culture for you?
- What lessons have you learned in managing tense relationships within divisions, departments, or even families?
Chuck Scharenberg, the brain behind More Profit More Freedom, guides first-year C-suite leaders in making their mark – crafting unified teams and robust infrastructures that allow them to serve more customers.